Monday, February 20, 2012

First Campaigner Challenge (of Fourth Compaign)

The Power of a Word

Shadows crept across the wall, stretching their dark, cold fingers towards the trembling girl. The orange glow of the fireplace was now mocking the security it once had provided.
Her eyes darted towards the bucket of dirty water. Could she reach it in time? It was almost two arm's lengths away. Would it be enough to quench the flames? She herself had provided new logs not long ago, so it would burn bright and last long.
Or might she save her life by throwing in more of the white powder? The mage could coax a spark out of a bundle of wet grass with a pinch of it. He also could call lightning inside the room, by throwing a handful into the air. But there always was a word. And it was a different incantation for every different purpose.
'No!' The shadows had almost reached her. There was nowhere else to go, for the darkness was closing in on all sides, despite the fire. The bucket of water had already vanished. 
Eyes fixed on the last visible bits of powder, which had spilled on the floor when the mage had fallen, the girl screamed a single word until everything faded.

word count: 200


Those were the rules, as given by Rachael: 
Write a flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. 
Begin the story with the words, “Shadows crept across the wall”. These five words will be included in the word count.
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), do one or more of these:
- end the story with the words: "everything faded." (also included in the word count)
- include the word "orange" in the story< - write in the same genre you normally write (in my case: fantasy)

- make your story 200 words exactly!

If you like this, please vote for my story, it's #59 (although it was #60 in the beginning).



P.S.: I declare that this little piece of story is part of my Messenger-project, which can be found here under the respective label.

47 comments:

  1. Ooh very scary!! Great imagery, too! I wish I knew more of the story! Great job!

    I'm entry #19

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    Replies
    1. Well, there is a little more about the Messenger. Be my guest :)

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  2. Well, you might remember my contribution to the Renaissance challenge, The Messenger. I've always wanted to explore the characters and ideas I created for that a bit more ... and it seems I finally could encourage my Muse to play along.

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  3. The mage sounds like a scary guy. I wouldn't want to be alone in a room with him. Nice entry. :)

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    Replies
    1. Well, in this case, the shadows seemed to be even scarier than the mage ;)

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  4. Sounds very intriguing - I want to know more. Well done!

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    1. Thank you! Well, there is a bit more of that under the label "messenger". I would be happy if you'd take a look.

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  5. Wow, must've been the wrong word... Unless maybe she made everything go dark. Creeeeepy and suspenseful!

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    1. I guess, she didn't have much time to choose wisely ;)

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  6. Creepy! I wonder what happened...

    Nice work! :)

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    Replies
    1. Well, you might find out if you stop by here now and then ;)

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  7. You had me at "magic." Good invoking of fear. Nice one! :)

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  8. Well-written suspense! Loving the magical elements of the story!

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    1. How nice of you to stop by! Thank you for the praise :)

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  9. Excellent build-up and I'm a sucker for magic and mages.

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    1. What a pity that the mage has already fallen, but I guess there is still some of his magic around.

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  10. I really liked it! Scary and suspenseful! Nice job! :)

    I'm #37

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    Replies
    1. Thank you :) I never knew, I really cold write scary (in a good way).

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  11. hesitation cost her! ah!
    nice piece!

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    1. Perhaps ;) Who can know for sure?

      Have your written a flash-fiction for the challenge, too? I couldn't find one in your blogs just now.

      Delete
  12. I wanted that white powder!!
    Great job!

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  13. All I wanna know is, what was the one word? :) Great job, enjoyed your story.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, perhaps you'll learn it one day if you keep visiting ...

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  14. Replies
    1. Thank you for the praise!
      I like your icon ;)

      Have you written something for the challenge, too? I couldn't find it in your blogs.

      Delete
  15. I was completely engrossed. Mine is #71

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  16. I like the magical twist here. Did she get the right word?

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    1. Well, perhaps we'll find out one day ;)

      I tried to find your story in the list, but there are just so many now. Which is your number?

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  17. Seems like there could be a much bigger story here. Nice job.

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    1. I would like to explore this world a little bit more.

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  18. scary! poor little girl. i hope she kicked back the darkness.. i want more! and i just voted for you! thanks 4 voting mine :)

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    Replies
    1. I can assure you, she did her best.
      But if it was enough, is still to be seen ;)

      Thank you very much for the vote!

      Delete
  19. I really liked this line:

    The mage could coax a spark out of a bundle of wet grass with a pinch of it.

    It stuck with me. Nice :D

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    1. That sort of wrote itself, I'm quite pleased with it myself :)

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  20. I don't know how my earlier comment hasn't appeared...I enjoyed this one, another unique take on the prompt. A wrong word that hopefully didn't start another destruction elsewhere. Well paced and imaginative.

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    1. I'm sorry that blogspot swallowed your first comment, and thank you for trying again!
      You can believe me, the word certainly had some effect.

      Delete
  21. Enjoyed your story, magic, mages, fires and darkness! It had it all!

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    1. Indeed it had, never looked at it that way :) It was fun to write some proper fantasy once more.

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  22. Great job in evoking a lot of interest. I want to find out more.

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